So, I bumped into Steve the other day. It could’ve been worse actually. I mean, it was awkward as hell but at least it wasn’t as bad as that time Catwoman and I ran into Batman just after their break up. We’d just popped into the all night Tesco in our pyjamas to re-stock on ice cream for the final leg of our Sex and the City marathon at 4am and there he was, tackling a thief to the ground. #awkward
Anyway, we were doing the polite small chat thing and he said that I ‘still looked the same’ in a way that made it clear he didn’t think that was a good thing. So I I told an eensy weensy little white lie. Well, anything to wipe the smug smile off his face.
‘I’m just on my way to the hairdressers actually. You know, Transformation Tuesday and all that – new colour, new style. You probably won’t even recognise me in a couple of days.’
He did that stupid smarmy thing he does with his face where he raises one eyebrow, smirks and shrugs simultaneously (how can he manage to do so many annoying things at once and still be so hot?). Then guess what he had the nerve to say? ‘Never gonna happen Diana.’ WTF. Who does he think he is? Seriously, was I just, like, drunk the ENTIRE time we were together or something? Dick.
Anyway, now I have to completely change my hair in case I run into him again – I am NOT giving him the satisfaction of being able to say I told you so.
I’m thinking red. Seeing as I spend 99% of my time in this corset-cum-supersuit get up, might as well go for a matching look (and we all know that blue hair doesn’t look good on anyone). Actually, if I get it cut really short, I might even be able to stop wearing the headband. God, that thing hurts after a full day and giving yourself a head massage just doesn’t have the same effect.
Oh god, I’m going to be in the hairdresser’s for ages aren’t I? I’ll just take my book so they can’t talk to me, and my headphones – can they cut your hair if you’re wearing headphones?
The original prompt for this post came from 712 more things to write about by the San Francisco Writer’s Grotto.
“Wonder Woman has cut her hair. Why?”